The Danny Shelton Letters To Linda Options

[Eirene]

Grith
Thank you so much for your powerful testimony. You are adding another layer to the 3ABN situation.
Rosyroi

Rosyroi, Do you have any idea how ridiculous your comment is. Another layer?
From what I read Grith doesn't know Danny personally much less counseled or even talked with him at length. Does Grith have such a degree in counseling and if so, what kind of counselor would make such a judgement over some emails sent during such a horrible time and without ever talking to the person?
Most everyone here have jumped all over John L about counseling Linda face to face saying he wasn't a "real" counselor. It has been said that Mark F could not have actually "counseled" with her over the phone. That isn't real counseling.
But now, because it is convenient for you to do so, let's listen to someone who doesn't know the parties, has never talked to Danny and whom, I would guess, doesn't have credentials to even make that sort of judgment.
After all that, let's then say that Grith is adding another "layer" to 3abn. How does an outsider with just another random opinion add another layer to 3abn?
Just another prime example of how you and others are willing to swallow anything that is fed to you regardless of who does the feeding, and, with nothing whatsoever to back it up except their opinions and the opinions of others in the same boat.

[awesumtenor]

Rosyroi, Do you have any idea how ridiculous your comment is. Another layer?

Do you have any idea how unnecessary this comment is? Rosyroi is entitled to her opinion of Grith's comments as you are entitled to yours. If you disagree, then disagree... but if one were to call your opinions ridiculous, you'd be whining to an admin... do unto others as you would have them do unto you...

From what I read Grith doesn't know Danny personally much less counseled or even talked with him at length.

By her own admission, neither does Cindy... yet you have no problem accepting what she says.

Does Grith have such a degree in counseling and if so, what kind of counselor would make such a judgement over some emails sent during such a horrible time and without ever talking to the person?

The same question can be asked of the conclusions you so readily jump to regarding Gailon or Pickle or Linda or whoever else is on your radar for the day...

Most everyone here have jumped all over John L about counseling Linda face to face saying he wasn't a "real" counselor. It has been said that Mark F could not have actually "counseled" with her over the phone. That isn't real counseling.

Those things were not said by "most everyone; they were said by the participants in these threads who have the education and professional experience to know what is and what is not counseling.

But now, because it is convenient for you to do so, let's listen to someone who doesn't know the parties, has never talked to Danny and whom, I would guess, doesn't have credentials to even make that sort of judgment.

Again, by her own admission, Cindy is in the number of people who fit the above categorization... yet you not only listen to what she says, you continue to defend it as incontrovertible truth, the absence of objective verification notwithstanding.

So weighed in the same balance you try to weigh others... you are found wanting.

In His service,
Mr. J

[Jnana15]

So Grith, because you read emails from Danny at the most stressful, hurtful and heart breaking time of his life, you have convicted him as an abuser and now, because you think it, it has become a fact.
I gather you don't know DS personally? Do you know Linda personally? If not then you didn't witness their marriage of 20 years. How unfair of you to judge and convict someone over a few emails during a terrible time.
If you really knew/believed/felt ( I won't get into that now because it isn't the point) that your husband was having an affair and you had begged, pleaded and talked until you were blue, and he refused to give up the "relationship" what kind of emails would you have sent to him and those supporting him in what he was doing?
I do know them personally. I did see their marriage up close for many years. Linda was "catered" to, spoiled, built up far too much, and was given way too much power at the ministry which ultimately contributed to her downfall. She was put on a pedestal and got her way about most things. If Danny should be faulted at all, it would be in exerting too little control over what seemed to be an "out of control" person. There was never ever any kind of abuse, physical, mental or otherwise.
Now Grith, what will show your true colors will be, if, you go ahead and stick with your own judgement and opinions from what you read, or listen to someone who watched and experienced that marriage first hand.
As far as his remarriage. It was 2 years after the divorce and he "knows" as do others involved in that situation, whether he had grounds to remarry. Right now the general public knows less than nothing about the "true" details. If your point was more that Linda didn't marry the Doctor, has it occured to anyone that it might not have been for lack of want on her side but ,maybe, a refusal on his part?

Should have known you were lurking around the corner waiting to . Somewhere in the bible it says the we (women) are like broken cisterns. Maybe Danny was treating her like the "Oueen" of his house should be treated since he clams to counter-act the counter-fit ( did I say this right? ). JMO. You weren't living in the house with them. You were only a "Bystander".

[PeacefulBe]

Eirene,

Each of us filters things through the template of our own life experience. It is what gives us each our own unique perspectives. One who has been burned by a stove usually learns to recognize that when there is fire present or the burners are orange, the stove is hot. A person who has been abused has learned, through personal lessons in the school of hard knocks, to recognize the traits or tone of an abuser.

If Girth's experience has caused her to have the opinion that Danny's words are that of an abusive person, it is her opinion, her deduction, and it is inappropriate to belittle her for that. If you don't agree with her personal assessment, the kind and appropriate way to counter is to state your own opinion from your own frame of reference.

[princessdi]

Mad props for that one Gurl!

Should have known you were lurking around the corner waiting to . Somewhere in the bible it says the we (women) are like broken cisterns. Maybe Danny was treating her like the "Oueen" of his house should be treated since he clams to counter-act the counter-fit ( did I say this right? ). JMO. You weren't living in the house with them. You were only a "Bystander".

[Skyhook]

Eirene,

A person who has been abused has learned, through personal lessons in the school of hard knocks, to recognize the traits or tone of an abuser.

If Girth's experience has caused her to have the opinion that Danny's words are that of an abusive person, it is her opinion, her deduction, and it is inappropriate to belittle her for that. If you don't agree with her personal assessment, the kind and appropriate way to counter is to state your own opinion from your own frame of reference.

It has been often stated by professionals who deal with the abused and the abusers, that they can spot one another and connect as strangers even in a crowd. There seems to be a certain chemistry or certain "vibes" that are perceived on an unconscious level. I don't think it is at all surprising that Grith who has had personal experience with an abuser would recognize from the emails the kinds of things being said by Danny. I believe that those professionals with experience can also fairly quickly note the characteristics being displayed by an abuser by thier attitude and by thier words. The same with those who have a pattern of being abused.

I believe that there has been enough first hand information from Danny and from those who know and work with him past and present to get a pretty accurate picture of his character. I dare say a trained psychologist could make an assessment just based on information on Bsda that would coincide fairly closely with a face to face assessment and testing such as MMPI, etc. But JMHO

[Grith]

Eirene,
"I perceive that thou art in the gall of bitterness, and in the bond of iniquity." (Acts 8:23)

Your stress hormones must be over the top which can lead to ill health, including heart disease. Further, you cannot possibly hope to gain the respect of most people here when you throw out wild accusations about those you disagree with. If you'll put down the and take off the , stop , your opinions will be better received even by those who disagree with you.

[Eirene]

Eirene,

Each of us filters things through the template of our own life experience. It is what gives us each our own unique perspectives. One who has been burned by a stove usually learns to recognize that when there is fire present or the burners are orange, the stove is hot. A person who has been abused has learned, through personal lessons in the school of hard knocks, to recognize the traits or tone of an abuser.

If Girth's experience has caused her to have the opinion that Danny's words are that of an abusive person, it is her opinion, her deduction, and it is inappropriate to belittle her for that. If you don't agree with her personal assessment, the kind and appropriate way to counter is to state your own opinion from your own frame of reference.

I didn't state my opinions period. I stated facts. Spin all you want but there is something terribly wrong here when you take Jane Doe's opinion over an eyewitness. That pretty much confirms you don't want truth, you want to sling mud.

Should have known you were lurking around the corner waiting to . Somewhere in the bible it says the we (women) are like broken cisterns. Maybe Danny was treating her like the "Oueen" of his house should be treated since he clams to counter-act the counter-fit ( did I say this right? ). JMO. You weren't living in the house with them. You were only a "Bystander".

A close bystander at that...which I believe is more than you were?

Do you have any idea how unnecessary this comment is? Rosyroi is entitled to her opinion of Grith's comments as you are entitled to yours. If you disagree, then disagree... but if one were to call your opinions ridiculous, you'd be whining to an admin... do unto others as you would have them do unto you...

By her own admission, neither does Cindy... yet you have no problem accepting what she says.


In His service,
Mr. J

mmm you really are obsessed with Cindy aren't you? You know what they say. There is a fine line between love and hate....

[awesumtenor]

mmm you really are obsessed with Cindy aren't you? You know what they say. There is a fine line between love and hate....

As I told you before... my name is not Mandingo...

In His service,
Mr. J

[Rosyroi]

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well... arent we supposed to be nice to those who despise and abuse us?

Rosyroi

editing again for content after finding out we lost Eirene and Alethia due to the choices they made.



Have a happy life for the two of you. You were warned several times. You ignored the warnings. It was your choice. NOT Admin.

Rosyroi

This post has been edited by Rosyroi: May 14 2007, 08:39 PM

[Jnana15]

A close bystander at that...which I believe is more than you were?

Edited big time! I just noticed that Eirene is GONE!

This post has been edited by Jnana15: May 13 2007, 10:43 PM

[FineArt]

Sometimes, knowing somone personally isn't necessary. just watching them walk to the mike with arrogance is enough. And when the mouth opens and words are spoken .....Mount Everest ego/pride appears. If this happens just once or for only one year.....your assumption might be wrong, but over many years......you could be on to something. Body language can even speak louder than words.

a personal observation. I have no PDQ or MRI or ASAP after my name.....just watching and listening to 3ABN.

[PrincessDrRe]

Oooooooooo EDITED FOR THE BYE-BYE OF THE ONE I WUZ RESPONDING TO

Yall carry on now!



This post has been edited by PrincessDrRe: May 14 2007, 09:17 PM

[Skyhook]

Sometimes, knowing somone personally isn't necessary. just watching them walk to the mike with arrogance is enough. And when the mouth opens and words are spoken .....Mount Everest ego/pride appears. If this happens just once or for only one year.....your assumption might be wrong, but over many years......you could be on to something. Body language can even speak louder than words.

a personal observation. I have no PDQ or MRI or ASAP after my name.....just watching and listening to 3ABN.

FineArt, I totally agree with you. There is often a first impression that we get about people on a visceral level that gives us accurate information about the person. As you say, it can sometimes fool us. But when we get confirmation from people who know and work with/for them we can be pretty confidant about our perceptions. . Some people are more sensitive to these kinds of impression than others, and we shouldn't automatically dismiss those first impressions. There have been some research done on this. The book "Blink" by Malcom Gladwell describes some of it. It is worth reading if one is interested in those things.
The opposite can be also true. People can be completely misled by the visual picture ones gets from a person. Gladwell points out that perhaps one of our worst presidents was elected because he looked so presidential. (Warren Harding)

[Princess]