The Danny Shelton Letters To Linda Options

[mozart]

Mozart, I think you got it right!

From Medline Plus:

Narcissistic Personality Disorder is a condition characterized by an inflated sense of self-importance and an extreme preoccupation with one's self.

The cause of this disorder is unknown. Narcisstic personality disorder usually begins by early adulthood and is marked by disregard for the feelings of others, grandiosity, obsessive self-interest and the pursuit of primarily selfish goals.

A person with narcissistic disorder:

Reacts to criticism with feelings of rage, shame, or humiliation
Takes advantage of others to acheive own goals
Has feelings of self-importance
Exaggerates achievements and talents
Is preoccupied with fantasies of success, power, beauty, intelligence, or ideal love
Has unreasonable expectations of favorable treatment
Requires constant attention and admiration
Lacks empathy

Complications: Relationship and family problems
Alcohol or other drug dependence

thank you for clarifying this skyhook. i appreciate your research. so i guess it's spelled narcissist. my bad; i forgot the "t" what BS fails to be able to comprehend is that i, along with many, many others, truly care for danny and want him to be well. we want him to be healed. defending him is like defending an alcoholic. it doesn't help the alcoholic at all. from now on i think i will just ignore his (BS) post even when it concerns me. if anyone else wants to ask a question, however, i'd be happy to answer. it would be wise to remember the words of 2 Timothy 3: 1-9: "But know this, that in the last days perilous times will come: For men will be lovers of themselves, lovers of money, boasters, proud, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy, unloving, unforgiving, slanderers, without self-control, brutal, despisers of good, traitors, headstrong, haughty, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God, having a form of godliness but denying its power. And from such people turn away! For of this sort are those who creep into households and make captives of gullible women loaded down with sins, led away by various lust, always learning and never able to come to the knowledge of the truth. Now as Jannes and Jambres resisted Moses, so do these also resist the truth; men of corrupt minds, disapproved concerning the faith; but they will progress no further, for their folly will be manifest to all, as theirs also was." 2 Timothy 3:14,15: "But as for you, continue in the things which you have learned and been assured of, knowing from whom you have learned them, and that from childhood you have known the Holy Scriptures, which are able to make you wise to salvation through faith in Christ Jesus."

Please explain the logic of this post-divorce mentality.

WWJD said:
If the above statement by WWJD is true, then:

Danny got a divorce in 2004
Brandy got a divorce in 2004
Linda got a divorce in 2004

However, it's only Linda's post-divorce behavior that has Bystander saying that "you can't spin that into being appropriate behavior."

But, everything Danny and Brandy did after their own divorces that same year is appropriate behavior, by the same standard?

I guess I'm missing the logic here because it seems to me that if post-divorce behavior is indicative of something important, we must include the post-divorce behavior of all three parties, not just of Linda Shelton. Somebody here seems justified in applying a totally separate set of rules to Linda Shelton's post-divorce life than they apply to everyone else's life that existed in the same post-divorce situation. That makes no logical sense.

you're sharp as a tack petey boy

[Bystander]

Mozart, I think you got it right!

From Medline Plus:

Narcissistic Personality Disorder is a condition characterized by an inflated sense of self-importance and an extreme preoccupation with one's self.

The cause of this disorder is unknown. Narcisstic personality disorder usually begins by early adulthood and is marked by disregard for the feelings of others, grandiosity, obsessive self-interest and the pursuit of primarily selfish goals.

A person with narcissistic disorder:

Reacts to criticism with feelings of rage, shame, or humiliation
Takes advantage of others to acheive own goals
Has feelings of self-importance
Exaggerates achievements and talents
Is preoccupied with fantasies of success, power, beauty, intelligence, or ideal love
Has unreasonable expectations of favorable treatment
Requires constant attention and admiration
Lacks empathy

Complications: Relationship and family problems
Alcohol or other drug dependence

That is amazing. That describes Gailon Joy to a tee. Pickle would also fit several of those.

[Hawk]

Indeed Pete is sharp. Does the BS/WWJD care to elaborate on the quantity of time that Linda spent on the phone with Dr. Abrahamsen during the months of March, April and May of 2004 as compared to the time that Danny spent in person and on the phone with Brenda Walsh during that same time period?

How about Brandy? Did Linda move across the street from Dr. Abrahamsen after the divorce, and live on property provided by 3ABN acrosss the street from someone she "was not" having a "thing" with? Did Linda live in IL and Dr. Abrahamsen thousands of miles away in Norway? While Danny lived across the street from Brandy for much of that time? In a house provided by 3ABN? LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!! Y'uns are funny.

Oh! What about the "evidence" of the trips to Europe... after the divorce? Where did that "evidence" come from? A travel agency owned by a friend/donor of Danny's? Is that legal? Well, if the "evidence" is "produced" I suppose that it will be tracked and we will find out.

This post has been edited by Hawk: Mar 30 2007, 08:43 AM

[sister]

For all of those that believe DS used the doc as an excuse to "get rid" of Linda. For all those that don't believe she made numerous trips to norway when Nathan only went once. For all those that think the "dishrag" statement came from DS.

Paragraphs from email from DS to LS Feb o5

May says you are telling her things about me and Brandy. First of all you don't know, anything about what me and Brandy are or are not doing. And secondly, if I wanted to have a girlfriend now whether it would be a Brandy or a Jane Doe, it would be none of your business as you have now refused for over a year to let this Norwegian man go. You have refused all counsel that told you he must go, yet you and he still travel together and stay in each other's homes for up to two weeks at a time. I told you a long time ago that I can document all your travel schedule and I have. May says you told her that you have only been to Norway once and that was a year ago January. I told her that if she wasn't mistaken then you told her a big lie as I can document all your trips there. Surely she got that part of your conversation mixed up. I don't think you would think everyone is such simpleton's that we don't know the truth about your solo trips to Europe.

Anyway, we've been. divorced for nearly eight months and we all know that I have biblical grounds. If I want to date someone else I am free to do it. You dated this man for months while we were married. That is called sin, anyway you want to cut it.

You shouldn't worry anyway. Remember, you told me that the only thing I would ever get compared to you was "An old used dirty dish rag".

Danny Shelton

Okay, Bystander, I read the above and there is no proof, as usual. Show the evidence of the trips to Norway that took place while Linda was married to Danny. There was only one. The burden of proof is on your side now. You claim evidence, were are the receipts, ticket stubs, etc. All I see it a statement by Danny, no proof. Bring on the evidence so we call all see it. Or is this just another attempt by you to justify Danny's behavior?

Sister

[Johann]

Okay, Bystander, I read the above and there is no proof, as usual. Show the evidence of the trips to Norway that took place while Linda was married to Danny. There was only one. The burden of proof is on your side now. You claim evidence, were are the receipts, ticket stubs, etc. All I see it a statement by Danny, no proof. Bring on the evidence so we call all see it. Or is this just another attempt by you to justify Danny's behavior?

Sister

I can verify what Sister is stating here is true, not because I was told, but because I was there. Irmgard and I were in constant contact with Dr. Arild Abrahamsen. It would have been impossible for Linda to visit him in Norway without us knowing, and he could not have gone to America without us knowing it either. He could not have been at his clinic in Norway and in America at the same time.

Danny Shelton did not think of this possibility when he and Brenda made up stories, and to impress board members and other gullible people they insist on having ticket stubs, phone cards, etc.

I must admit that within a few days my admiration of Danny Shelton dropped to zero when I discovered how he behaved when he got caught in a lie. If only he had tried to apologize or in other ways rectify his evil behaviour, we would never be discussing this here today.

God still loves a repentant sinner, but the haughty are an abomination.

[Pickle]

i did paraphrase what he said but i don't think i misinterpreted it. i will not post my personal emails, but for your edification, this is his exact quote, "Let me begin by saying that the things being posted on the Internet denigrating Danny and the administration and board of 3abn are evil. Nothing posted there is in any way representative of the God I know and serve."

Poor choice of words on Walt's part? He thinks emails written by himself and Danny are evil, and not representative of God?

[Clay]

Hawk... quite insightful.... thanks for sharing that.... you made some excellent points...

[mozart]

Poor choice of words on Walt's part? He thinks emails written by himself and Danny are evil, and not representative of God?

that's exactly what i wrote him back and said.

[Grith]

When Linda disappeared from 3abn, I was mystified. Then I began hearing things about adultery. A friend told me that it was Brenda that had spilled the beans about it. I saw that program where Danny was so upset and asked Mark Finely to pray. I wasn't sure what to think. I began doing a little research and visited some message boards, but decided that I didn't really want to find out more. I didn't really want anything to do with the mess. I just assumed at the time that it was as Danny said. However, the phrase "spiritual adultery" did raise my eyebrows. That was no grounds for divorce.

When we moved a couple of years ago, we pulled up our dish and gave it to the church (where the parts still sits scattered around) thinking we would soon replace it. It didn't happen due to unforseen circumstances. I didn't think much about 3abn or the divorce until I received an email from a friend in Florida who had attended a rally there. She told me that Danny had introduced his new wife of 3 days on stage and so unsettled everyone that he didn't appear for the afternoon program! My thoughts at that time began to turn in Linda's favor. Danny had accused Linda of adultery, yet who was it that had remarried? Not Linda.

I didn't spend much time thinking about it until just a few short months ago. I sat down at my computer one afternoon and thought, Now what would I like to search for? I typed two words in Google and hit enter. Those two words brought up a blog that mentioned 3abn so I opened it and found a link for save3abn.com and for BSDA. The two words I typed in were "adventist" and "apostasy."

I went to save3abn and began to read. I read until I was too tired to read more that night and went to bed. I got up the next day and began reading again. When it came to the emails from Danny to Linda, I quickly realized one thing: my experience immediately recognized his words as those of an abuser. The things he wrote, and the manner in which he wrote them are the work of a man who will emotionally and psychologically batter another person in order to maintain control over them. You can never win with such a person. It was at that point that I came over to Linda's side. I wondered how Linda had ever lived with him for 20 years.

Someone here said that it was time for her to "get over it." I doubt that person has ever been turned into mush by the deliberately belittling, searing, cruel words of someone who professes to love you, but uses words in such a demeaning manner. I think I can even understand why she would not stop those emails from being posted. People (those in the pews) have seen one side of DS, the studio Danny, but they haven't seen the home Danny, the behind-the-scenes Danny. For Linda it may be a kind of catharsis to have them posted.

It wasn't just the emails to Linda that showed Danny as abusive, but those to Johann, and others. DS is a man who needs to surrender himself to God and let Him have control of his life. If he will do that, he will no longer have the need to build himself up by belittling and degrading others. He will seek forgiveness of those he has wronged. People will begin to respect him. We need to keep praying that God will be able to reach his heart and change him.

[Rosyroi]

When Linda disappeared from 3abn, I was mystified. Then I began hearing things about adultery. A friend told me that it was Brenda that had spilled the beans about it. I saw that program where Danny was so upset and asked Mark Finely to pray. I wasn't sure what to think. I began doing a little research and visited some message boards, but decided that I didn't really want to find out more. I didn't really want anything to do with the mess. I just assumed at the time that it was as Danny said. However, the phrase "spiritual adultery" did raise my eyebrows. That was no grounds for divorce.

When we moved a couple of years ago, we pulled up our dish and gave it to the church (where the parts still sits scattered around) thinking we would soon replace it. It didn't happen due to unforseen circumstances. I didn't think much about 3abn or the divorce until I received an email from a friend in Florida who had attended a rally there. She told me that Danny had introduced his new wife of 3 days on stage and so unsettled everyone that he didn't appear for the afternoon program! My thoughts at that time began to turn in Linda's favor. Danny had accused Linda of adultery, yet who was it that had remarried? Not Linda.

I didn't spend much time thinking about it until just a few short months ago. I sat down at my computer one afternoon and thought, Now what would I like to search for? I typed two words in Google and hit enter. Those two words brought up a blog that mentioned 3abn so I opened it and found a link for save3abn.com and for BSDA. The two words I typed in were "adventist" and "apostasy."

I went to save3abn and began to read. I read until I was too tired to read more that night and went to bed. I got up the next day and began reading again. When it came to the emails from Danny to Linda, I quickly realized one thing: my experience immediately recognized his words as those of an abuser. The things he wrote, and the manner in which he wrote them are the work of a man who will emotionally and psychologically batter another person in order to maintain control over them. You can never win with such a person. It was at that point that I came over to Linda's side. I wondered how Linda had ever lived with him for 20 years.

Someone here said that it was time for her to "get over it." I doubt that person has ever been turned into mush by the deliberately belittling, searing, cruel words of someone who professes to love you, but uses words in such a demeaning manner. I think I can even understand why she would not stop those emails from being posted. People (those in the pews) have seen one side of DS, the studio Danny, but they haven't seen the home Danny, the behind-the-scenes Danny. For Linda it may be a kind of catharsis to have them posted.

It wasn't just the emails to Linda that showed Danny as abusive, but those to Johann, and others. DS is a man who needs to surrender himself to God and let Him have control of his life. If he will do that, he will no longer have the need to build himself up by belittling and degrading others. He will seek forgiveness of those he has wronged. People will begin to respect him. We need to keep praying that God will be able to reach his heart and change him.

Grith
Thank you so much for your powerful testimony. You are adding another layer to the 3ABN situation.
Rosyroi

[roxe]

very powerful, Grith... so glad you shared... God Bless...

[PrincessDrRe]

....It wasn't just the emails to Linda that showed Danny as abusive, but those to Johann, and others. DS is a man who needs to surrender himself to God and let Him have control of his life. If he will do that, he will no longer have the need to build himself up by belittling and degrading others. He will seek forgiveness of those he has wronged. People will begin to respect him. We need to keep praying that God will be able to reach his heart and change him.

Welcome....

We keep saying it - and this is the truth! Actions speak louder than words....

[Noahswife]

When Linda disappeared from 3abn, I was mystified. Then I began hearing things about adultery. A friend told me that it was Brenda that had spilled the beans about it. I saw that program where Danny was so upset and asked Mark Finely to pray. I wasn't sure what to think. I began doing a little research and visited some message boards, but decided that I didn't really want to find out more. I didn't really want anything to do with the mess. I just assumed at the time that it was as Danny said. However, the phrase "spiritual adultery" did raise my eyebrows. That was no grounds for divorce.

When we moved a couple of years ago, we pulled up our dish and gave it to the church (where the parts still sits scattered around) thinking we would soon replace it. It didn't happen due to unforseen circumstances. I didn't think much about 3abn or the divorce until I received an email from a friend in Florida who had attended a rally there. She told me that Danny had introduced his new wife of 3 days on stage and so unsettled everyone that he didn't appear for the afternoon program! My thoughts at that time began to turn in Linda's favor. Danny had accused Linda of adultery, yet who was it that had remarried? Not Linda.

I didn't spend much time thinking about it until just a few short months ago. I sat down at my computer one afternoon and thought, Now what would I like to search for? I typed two words in Google and hit enter. Those two words brought up a blog that mentioned 3abn so I opened it and found a link for save3abn.com and for BSDA. The two words I typed in were "adventist" and "apostasy."

I went to save3abn and began to read. I read until I was too tired to read more that night and went to bed. I got up the next day and began reading again. When it came to the emails from Danny to Linda, I quickly realized one thing: my experience immediately recognized his words as those of an abuser. The things he wrote, and the manner in which he wrote them are the work of a man who will emotionally and psychologically batter another person in order to maintain control over them. You can never win with such a person. It was at that point that I came over to Linda's side. I wondered how Linda had ever lived with him for 20 years.

Someone here said that it was time for her to "get over it." I doubt that person has ever been turned into mush by the deliberately belittling, searing, cruel words of someone who professes to love you, but uses words in such a demeaning manner. I think I can even understand why she would not stop those emails from being posted. People (those in the pews) have seen one side of DS, the studio Danny, but they haven't seen the home Danny, the behind-the-scenes Danny. For Linda it may be a kind of catharsis to have them posted.

It wasn't just the emails to Linda that showed Danny as abusive, but those to Johann, and others. DS is a man who needs to surrender himself to God and let Him have control of his life. If he will do that, he will no longer have the need to build himself up by belittling and degrading others. He will seek forgiveness of those he has wronged. People will begin to respect him. We need to keep praying that God will be able to reach his heart and change him.

Grith

First of all welcome to BSDA.....

Second, I don't know how I missed this post but thank you for it. Please PM me if you do not want me to print it and hand it out to friends and family who do not understand what I personally feel about the DS/LS situation.......

Third, don't be surprised if one or another of us keeps bumping this to the top because although we will discuss various issues on numerous topics from litigation to thompsonville......this speaks to the heart of everyone that has ever been emotionally abused or knows someone who has been. You clearly get it even if some that post here do not....

nw
C"i"

This post has been edited by Noahswife: May 13 2007, 11:26 AM

[Jnana15]

Grith

First of all welcome to BSDA.....

Second, I don't know how I missed this post but thank you for it. Please PM me if you do not want me to print it and hand it out to friends and family who do not understand what I personally feel about the DS/LS situation.......

Third, don't be surprised if one or another of us keeps bumping this to the top because although we will discuss various issues on numerous topics from litigation to thompsonville......this speaks to the heart of everyone that has ever been emotionally abused or knows someone who has been. You clearly get it even if some that post here do not....

nw
C"i"

NW, thank you for offering to keep bumping this to the top, I know that I need to keep reading it. I don't know how I missed Girth's post either. I have been truly blessed by her post on the DS/LS situation.

[Eirene]

It wasn't just the emails to Linda that showed Danny as abusive, but those to Johann, and others. DS is a man who needs to surrender himself to God and let Him have control of his life. If he will do that, he will no longer have the need to build himself up by belittling and degrading others. He will seek forgiveness of those he has wronged. People will begin to respect him. We need to keep praying that God will be able to reach his heart and change him.

So Grith, because you read emails from Danny at the most stressful, hurtful and heart breaking time of his life, you have convicted him as an abuser and now, because you think it, it has become a fact.
I gather you don't know DS personally? Do you know Linda personally? If not then you didn't witness their marriage of 20 years. How unfair of you to judge and convict someone over a few emails during a terrible time.
If you really knew/believed/felt ( I won't get into that now because it isn't the point) that your husband was having an affair and you had begged, pleaded and talked until you were blue, and he refused to give up the "relationship" what kind of emails would you have sent to him and those supporting him in what he was doing?
I do know them personally. I did see their marriage up close for many years. Linda was "catered" to, spoiled, built up far too much, and was given way too much power at the ministry which ultimately contributed to her downfall. She was put on a pedestal and got her way about most things. If Danny should be faulted at all, it would be in exerting too little control over what seemed to be an "out of control" person. There was never ever any kind of abuse, physical, mental or otherwise.
Now Grith, what will show your true colors will be, if, you go ahead and stick with your own judgement and opinions from what you read, or listen to someone who watched and experienced that marriage first hand.
As far as his remarriage. It was 2 years after the divorce and he "knows" as do others involved in that situation, whether he had grounds to remarry. Right now the general public knows less than nothing about the "true" details. If your point was more that Linda didn't marry the Doctor, has it occured to anyone that it might not have been for lack of want on her side but ,maybe, a refusal on his part?