Chapter 11, Naive.... Options

[sister]

“Naive”, Part 1

Linda sits quietly in a chair, gazing out the living room window. Danny has just left the room. Her shoulders begins to shake as a single tear slowly makes its way down her cheek, as her lips begin to tremble she hears the roar of Danny's truck as he drives away... Soon the single tear is joined by many others, etching her delicate features like stained glass. Clasping her hands together she falls to her knees and begins to pray... At the same time Linda is praying, Danny is seated in his office viewing a website for private jets.

* * * * *

I have remained silent so far in the discussion concerning certain character attributes of Linda. I can understand both sides of this issue: the portrayal of Linda by Sonshineonme as a very naive individual and the call for Linda’s accountability in regard to what transpired under the rulership of 3ABN and the question of what knowledge she possessed of certain facts at the time.

In the former portrayal, it might be best to define the term “naive” as a “childlike trusting nature and vulnerability”, someone who looks for the good in situations and is shocked upon the discovery that everything in her world was not as it was depicted to her by her husband. Linda is an individual with these character traits and thus can easily be dominated and manipulated by a controlling and dishonest individual. When Linda was under the control of Danny and her perspective of situations were shaped primarily through his “interpretation” of the “facts”, Linda’s viewpoint seldom reflected the reality of the situation. Add to this mix a woman who deeply loves her husband and has been controlled by him for twenty years and you have both a case of abuse and manipulation: a woman who has been conditioned to believe everything her husband tells her and taught not to question his credibility or decisions. Considering Linda’s character, this situation existed throughout their entire marriage, in varying degrees.

Now in regard to the situation cited in my third post of the Unauthorized History of 3ABN, based upon the above information, whose word is Linda going to believe in regard to the misuse of ministry funds: her husband or his cousin? If her husband tells her he paid for the horses himself and his cousin says he used ministry monies for private purchases, she will side with her husband. With the mind set she has developed with Danny, that is the only conclusion she could allow herself to believe. Unfortunately, she did not investigate further for herself, for she believed her husband. Add to that the knowledge that between them they earned about 100, 000 dollars a year and she saw no reason for Danny steal from the ministry, he could afford to buy horses himself. That is where the “childlike trusting nature and vulnerability”, which would usually be considered a positive trait in a Christian, is used to manipulate Linda into complete trust and compliance in what her husband said. And further explains how she could make the following statement in utter confidence, “anything Danny says is right, even if he is wrong, we are like gods here.” She never considered the possibility that Danny was lying...

1. She believed what her husband said was true
2. She did not believe that he would intentionally misrepresent his actions
3. She believed he was a godly man.

And in regard to the last part of the statement, “we are like gods here.”,

4. I agree, it was not a very wise statement to make, no matter what her intentions were at the time. But as the old adage goes, "hindsight is 20/20 and if Linda could change that statement now, with the knowledge that she has today, I am sure she would have phrased her thoughts very differently. But, much later she did find out just how true that statement was in regard to the absolute control Danny has over 3ABN as a business and the functioning of the Board.

Were there actions on Danny’s part that she knew about and protested against? Yes. Was she able to stop him? No. Did she try to reason with him? Yes. Did it produce her desired results? No. Did she suffer abuse for opposing him?

Stay tuned for Part 2 of Naive...



This post has been edited by sister: Sep 16 2006, 09:37 AM

[justme]

"sister",

Thank you so much!

This IS the Linda WE have known and LOVED as well!!!

These are the very point I have been trying to say for so long...

That's what I have been trying to say, but I don't have that gift of expression as do you.

THANK YOU
THANK YOU THANK YOU, "sister"

MORE, MORE PLEASE!

[PeacefulBe]

“Naive”, Part 1

Now in regard to the situation cited in my third post of the Unauthorized History of 3ABN, based upon the above information, whose word is Linda going to believe in regard to the misuse of ministry funds: her husband or his cousin? If her husband tells her he paid for the horses himself and his cousin says he used ministry monies for private purchases, she will side with her husband. With the mind set she has developed with Danny, that is the only conclusion she could allow herself to believe. Unfortunately, she did not investigate further for herself, for she believed her husband. Add to that the knowledge that between them they earned about 100, 000 dollars a year and she saw no reason for Danny steal from the ministry, he could afford to buy horses himself. That is where the “childlike trusting nature and vulnerability”, which would usually be considered a positive trait in a Christian, is used to manipulate Linda into complete trust and compliance in what her husband said. And further explains how she could make the following statement in utter confidence, “anything Danny says is right, even if he is wrong, we are like gods here.” She never considered the possibility that Danny was lying...

1. She believed what her husband said was true
2. She did not believe that he would intentionally misrepresent his actions
3. She believed he was a godly man.

And in regard to the last part of the statement, “we are like gods here.”,

4. I agree, it was not a very wise statement to make, no matter what her intentions were at the time. But as the old adage goes, "hindsight is 20/20 and if Linda could change that statement now, with the knowledge that she has today, I am sure she would have phrased her thoughts very differently. But, much later she did find out just how true that statement was in regard to the absolute control Danny has over 3ABN as a business and the functioning of the Board.

Were there actions on Danny’s part that she knew about and protested against? Yes. Was she able to stop him? No. Did she try to reason with him? Yes. Did it produce her desired results? No. Did she suffer abuse for opposing him?

Stay tuned for Part 2 of Naive...

Thank you, Sister, for putting the situation more into context. As I mentioned in a post in another thread, I understand the survival/coping mechanisms of a person being controlled by a dominant, abusive spouse.

The statement, in your "We Be Gods.." thread read by itself kind of painted a picture of Linda as dismissing misuse of funds. It certainly gave me pause. Thanks for clarifying.

[Treniece]

So, is Danny accused of misusing 3abn funds also. If he used the money to buy horses maybe he considers the horses as 3abn horses. Where is the proof? How much truth is there in this rumour.

[roxe]

sister,

when are the rest of the parts of chapter 11 going to be posted??
it's been four months...

or are they being written now as they happen??

[Richard Sherwin]

I consider a ministry using a corperate jet to fly it's leader around in a misuse of funds. I believe the figure is $40,000 per month, not including expences like pilots, jet A fuel, insurance etc.

Richard

So, is Danny accused of misusing 3abn funds also. If he used the money to buy horses maybe he considers the horses as 3abn horses. Where is the proof? How much truth is there in this rumour.

[inga]

So, is Danny accused of misusing 3abn funds also. If he used the money to buy horses maybe he considers the horses as 3abn horses.

So would that make a difference?

What "ministering" could horses do for 3ABN?

When you think of it, Dan Shelton doesn't have to "own" anything to support a lifestyle quite above the average folks. If 3ABN "owns" things that he can use as he wishes, that is quite sufficient, and he doesn't have to pay taxes on the income.

[Bystander]

“Naive”, Part 1

Linda sits quietly in a chair, gazing out the living room window. Danny has just left the room. Her shoulders begins to shake as a single tear slowly makes its way down her cheek, as her lips begin to tremble she hears the roar of Danny's truck as he drives away... Soon the single tear is joined by many others, etching her delicate features like stained glass. Clasping her hands together she falls to her knees and begins to pray... At the same time Linda is praying, Danny is seated in his office viewing a website for private jets.

:r

[watchbird]

“Naive”, Part 1

Linda sits quietly in a chair, gazing out the living room window. Danny has just left the room. Her shoulders begins to shake as a single tear slowly makes its way down her cheek, as her lips begin to tremble she hears the roar of Danny's truck as he drives away... Soon the single tear is joined by many others, etching her delicate features like stained glass. Clasping her hands together she falls to her knees and begins to pray... At the same time Linda is praying, Danny is seated in his office viewing a website for private jets.

:r

Now THAT reaction is not only the crassest thing I have seen in a long time... but also down right evil in my book!..... You have REALLY reached a new low with this one, "Bystander"!!!.... .....

[Johann]

Now THAT reaction is not only the crassest thing I have seen in a long time... but also down right evil in my book!..... You have REALLY reached a new low with this one, "Bystander"!!!.... .....

We know that both good and evil angels are all around us. Which ones will be permitted to guide us through this crusial issue?

[Snoopy]

“Naive”, Part 1

Linda sits quietly in a chair, gazing out the living room window. Danny has just left the room. Her shoulders begins to shake as a single tear slowly makes its way down her cheek, as her lips begin to tremble she hears the roar of Danny's truck as he drives away... Soon the single tear is joined by many others, etching her delicate features like stained glass. Clasping her hands together she falls to her knees and begins to pray... At the same time Linda is praying, Danny is seated in his office viewing a website for private jets.

:r

This is horrifying. Please tell me this post was a mistake.

[Fran]

“Naive”, Part 1

Linda sits quietly in a chair, gazing out the living room window. Danny has just left the room. Her shoulders begins to shake as a single tear slowly makes its way down her cheek, as her lips begin to tremble she hears the roar of Danny's truck as he drives away... Soon the single tear is joined by many others, etching her delicate features like stained glass. Clasping her hands together she falls to her knees and begins to pray... At the same time Linda is praying, Danny is seated in his office viewing a website for private jets.

:r

Are you implying that Danny did not search the internet to find the kind of jet that he truly deserved? If I were to bet, I'd bet he really did!

As always, your "I hate Linda" Venom is dripping again! You really must stop drooling. I believe that paragraph.

I believe it depicts Linda, as a true Christian. I believe Linda is a person of much prayer. And yes, I believe Danny is about getting what he has determined that he deserves. He felt he was entitled to a better jet.

Linda clearly accepted the fact that she was entitled to nothing. She still remains faithful to God. She has had everything stolen from her, yet she still praises God. Oh that I would have her faith.

Surely you are laughing at Danny. Surely you would not belittle Linda's faith and prayers.

Well, maybe you would since you are doing everything in your power to destroy one classy lady.

[awesumtenor]

This is horrifying. Please tell me this post was a mistake.

Bystander forgets that he will stand before God someday... and the standard for judging him will be
" inasmuch as ye have done it unto the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto me"

And in that day he will say...?

Dunno... but I bet he wont be ROFL...

In His service,
Mr. J

[andithomas1]

“Naive”, Part 1

Linda sits quietly in a chair, gazing out the living room window. Danny has just left the room. Her shoulders begins to shake as a single tear slowly makes its way down her cheek, as her lips begin to tremble she hears the roar of Danny's truck as he drives away... Soon the single tear is joined by many others, etching her delicate features like stained glass. Clasping her hands together she falls to her knees and begins to pray... At the same time Linda is praying, Danny is seated in his office viewing a website for private jets.

:r

I really find it interesting that someone that professes to be a Christian would read this and respond in this manner. I find myself, as others have asking you why individuals on one side of this drama deserves understanding and forgiveness, but the lady doesn't. I think the "good book" tells us not be a respecter of persons, but when has that Bible truth ever been practiced in this church-Adventist Church.

Once again, I need to qualify my impression-I care nothing about 3ABN, can count the number of times I have watch its programming on one hand. The Shelton and other players in this fiasco mean nothing to me, but if half of what has been posted on this board is true, there are serious issues around 3ABN and the powers that be.

Lets dispel this fallacy for those who want to keep the status quo so that dying sinners can receive salvation-through 3ABN. The gospel was spread before 3ABN and will continue to be spread with or without it. We limit God, he doesn't need us.

[sister]

In regard to Part 2 of "Naive", there is more to this story. I have not been ignoring the request that I continue the Saga of "An Unauthorized History of 3ABN" with the second part of "Naive" , but I have been uncertain how to answer this request. I had come to a point in the "History" where I felt that the work the Lord had given me in regard to it was basically completed. Instead I had returned to being a participant in the 3ABN Forum, within BSDA, and with the pinning of the "History" considered that my task was completed. The story is not finished and continues on as I write this, but at this point I am questioning if it is my task to complete it here? Please continue to have patience with me in regard to this matter as I prayerfully consider my next step.

Sister