Thompson Responds To Abrahamsen...., borrowed from Maritime Options

[watchbird]

Did Linda know Danny suspected her of having an affair at this point? If so, wasn't this a poor choice for a practical joke?

At this time Linda knew that Danny was accusing her of "having an affair". She also knew that she wasn't having one, and was searching for ways to communicate that to him. She didn't have any even the ghost of an idea that Danny himself was guilty of what he was accusing her of, and she was completely baffled as to the reason for the increasing hostility with which he was treating her. And she was still, at least to some extent, buying into the "it must be my fault" philosophy which all abused persons hold--and even more so when they have been fed a steady diet of the extreme Pentecostal version of "it's the wifely duty to submit no matter what the issue".

So yes. It was a very poor idea to try and meet this with a practical joke. But Linda, with her "strong points" of seeing only the best in everyone and all situations (which had stood her in good stead throughout her lifetime so far) and her innate "sense of humor" (which had also been one of the ways she had successfully met the vicissitudes of life) was not thinking objectively as to the possible outcomes of her little "joke."

now you know sometimes we think some things are funny, not thinking that the person on the other end is not gonna be amused....

I suspect that a "sense of humor" is something that one either has or doesn't have. To the person who has one, it is a release from tension (hence the old saying "we laugh so we don't have to cry), or a way to put things in perspective (getting someone to see the humor in a situation often helps them see things in a larger context). But to the person who doesn't have one, humor has quite the opposite effects, and they tend to be more insulted than amused. And since they perceive the joke to be a "kick in the shins" rather than an attempt to lighten the situation, it tends to focus their attention even more on their own self and their perceived "kicked shins". And particularly when that person is himself guilty of what he is accusing others -- he is definitely "not gonna be amused".

[Johann]

Did Linda know Danny suspected her of having an affair at this point? If so, wasn't this a poor choice for a practical joke?

A poor choice or not? It is a fairly well known fact that the greatest fools in the world have a hayday exposing their wisdom after the thing has happened. Even worse fools are they who never comprehend that somone else could do things any different than how they would do things when they know the end results from the beginning. Can anyone decipher what I am trying to say?

[Spike]

Did Danny really think Linda was having an affair (I don't think so) or was he looking for anything he could find that he could take to people and say look what I found. So when Linda bought the pg test she kind of handed Danny exactly what he was looking for and it just added fuel to the lies he had already been telling.

He must had been tickled pink when he found it.

[Panama_Pete]

A poor choice or not? It is a fairly well known fact that the greatest fools in the world have a hayday exposing their wisdom after the thing has happened. Even worse fools are they who never comprehend that somone else could do things any different than how they would do things when they know the end results from the beginning. Can anyone decipher what I am trying to say?

You are saying that human beings have 20/20 hindsight.

[summertime]

At this time Linda knew that Danny was accusing her of "having an affair". She also knew that she wasn't having one, and was searching for ways to communicate that to him. She didn't have any even the ghost of an idea that Danny himself was guilty of what he was accusing her of, and she was completely baffled as to the reason for the increasing hostility with which he was treating her. And she was still, at least to some extent, buying into the "it must be my fault" philosophy which all abused persons hold--and even more so when they have been fed a steady diet of the extreme Pentecostal version of "it's the wifely duty to submit no matter what the issue".

So yes. It was a very poor idea to try and meet this with a practical joke. But Linda, with her "strong points" of seeing only the best in everyone and all situations (which had stood her in good stead throughout her lifetime so far) and her innate "sense of humor" (which had also been one of the ways she had successfully met the vicissitudes of life) was not thinking objectively as to the possible outcomes of her little "joke."

I suspect that a "sense of humor" is something that one either has or doesn't have. To the person who has one, it is a release from tension (hence the old saying "we laugh so we don't have to cry), or a way to put things in perspective (getting someone to see the humor in a situation often helps them see things in a larger context). But to the person who doesn't have one, humor has quite the opposite effects, and they tend to be more insulted than amused. And since they perceive the joke to be a "kick in the shins" rather than an attempt to lighten the situation, it tends to focus their attention even more on their own self and their perceived "kicked shins". And particularly when that person is himself guilty of what he is accusing others -- he is definitely "not gonna be amused".

I had been watching 3ABN for a long time. Danny was the one who was always coming up with foolish statements and tellling about his own sense of humor. He loved to turn real statements into jokes. I remember him telling the 3ABN veiwers that he and Linda had flown on a commercial flight. (This was in the days before the private jets). I guess that Linda had become tired and went to sleep during the flight and had laid her head on his shoulder to sleep. He told it as a joke. He said that he called the flight attendent over and asked her if she would get this strange lady off of his shoulder. He thought that it was funny. At the time it was told Linda just smiled. I thought that it was strange for him to tell about it to millions of people. But that was Danny's way of using Linda for a pratical joke. I assumed that was their waya of relieving boredom on a long flight but it was really only funny to him. Could it have been that Linda had that pregnancy test for a joke between them to awaken his sense of humor which by that time had begun to fade.? Apparently they did tease and play jokes on one anaother during the 'good years'. Could this have been her way of holding his attention which also had begun to fade? He joked with her all the time on camera--even to the point of accusing her that he could get fleas from her dogs. Danny always thought that he was funny--even at times when it was inappropriate. He was fond of saying that he did not like dogs and Linda did not like his horses---big difference. Just a thought from the past

[calvin]

Linda buying a pregnancy test kit knowing that her husband was sterile and suspicious of her having an affair was STUPID. It was a bad ideal. If it was me I would have not found it funny but only add fuel to my suspicious. I would think that if you are innocent of the accused affair that you would not do anything to add to your spouse’s suspicious.

I hope that for those of you who are close to this story, are not so naïve to think that for others reading this that don’t know Danny or Linda, that they could come to a conclusion that there is more to this than a practical joke played by Linda.

[summertime]

I had been watching 3ABN for a long time. Danny was the one who was always coming up with foolish statements and tellling about his own sense of humor. He loved to turn real statements into jokes. I remember him telling the 3ABN veiwers that he and Linda had flown on a commercial flight. (This was in the days before the private jets). I guess that Linda had become tired and went to sleep during the flight and had laid her head on his shoulder to sleep. He told it as a joke. He said that he called the flight attendent over and asked her if she would get this strange lady off of his shoulder. He thought that it was funny. At the time it was told Linda just smiled. I thought that it was strange for him to tell about it to millions of people. But that was Danny's way of using Linda for a pratical joke. I assumed that was their waya of relieving boredom on a long flight but it was really only funny to him. Could it have been that Linda had that pregnancy test for a joke between them to awaken his sense of humor which by that time had begun to fade.? Apparently they did tease and play jokes on one anaother during the 'good years'. Could this have been her way of holding his attention which also had begun to fade? He joked with her all the time on camera--even to the point of accusing her that he could get fleas from her dogs. Danny always thought that he was funny--even at times when it was inappropriate. He was fond of saying that he did not like dogs and Linda did not like his horses---big difference. Just a thought from the past

And could it have been, that since Danny and Linda were still living together, that Linda had thought that maybe she was pregnant? Vasectomies do fail---I know of an instance where the surgery of that type did reverse itself---Many men have asked for dna tests when their wives had children after he thought that he had taken care of that possibility. At any rate, this is just about the most stupid thing that Dr. Thompson could have told millions of people---not only stupid but a personal thing that should not have been said--I doubt that the whole world wants to know about Danny's virility. I know that I don't. About the young folks around here, they laugh at this story being told about a man who is the 'face of Adventism.'. Personal information? Not with Dr. Thompson.

[calvin]

And could it have been, that since Danny and Linda were still living together, that Linda had thought that maybe she was pregnant? Vasectomies do fail---I know of an instance where the surgery of that type did reverse itself---Many men have asked for dna tests when their wives had children after he thought that he had taken care of that possibility. At any rate, this is just about the most stupid thing that Dr. Thompson could have told millions of people---not only stupid but a personal thing that should not have been said--I doubt that the whole world wants to know about Danny's virility. I know that I don't. About the young folks around here, they laugh at this story being told about a man who is the 'face of Adventism.'. Personal information? Not with Dr. Thompson.

Did not Johann and Watchbird say it was a pratical joke? Now you want to assume that Linda maybe thought she was pregnant or as other assumed that Danny must have planted the preganacy kit. What is this, Linda completely inocent, she can do no wrong?

[Clay]

Linda buying a pregnancy test kit knowing that her husband was sterile and suspicious of her having an affair was STUPID. It was a bad ideal. If it was me I would have not found it funny but only add fuel to my suspicious. I would think that if you are innocent of the accused affair that you would not do anything to add to your spouse’s suspicious.

I hope that for those of you who are close to this story, are not so naïve to think that for others reading this that don’t know Danny or Linda, that they could come to a conclusion that there is more to this than a practical joke played by Linda.

People do stupid things all the time, so this does not surprise me.... as for your other idea that if you were innocent you would not do anything to fuel your spouse's suspicions.....well.... being the heathen that I am, I would just for the fun of it.... btjm.....

[watchbird]

Linda buying a pregnancy test kit knowing that her husband was sterile and suspicious of her having an affair was STUPID. It was a bad ideal. If it was me I would have not found it funny but only add fuel to my suspicious. I would think that if you are innocent of the accused affair that you would not do anything to add to your spouse’s suspicious.

I hope that for those of you who are close to this story, are not so naïve to think that for others reading this that don’t know Danny or Linda, that they could come to a conclusion that there is more to this than a practical joke played by Linda.

You are quite correct. As I have said before, I too thought it was stupid--and I don't think that it would take hindsight to say that. I think I have a sense of humor--but I also think that many "practical jokes"--especially those played between husbands and wives and even other family members are most always stupid, and sometimes even cruel. I think it helps others to see that it was what it was claimed to be from the beginning--an intended practical joke--when they see the atmosphere in which this was done, that of being the butt of Danny's "jokes" through the years (which is why Summertime's observations are so important a background for understanding this experience.) I've seen such atmospheres--the "jokes" almost always have "barbs" in them and are often more cruel than funny. And the one who is most often the victim eventually learns the game and takes their own turns at least occasionally.

So yes, as much as admire Linda for her obvious good points and believe totally in her innocence of the charges, I still think this was a stupid thing to do, and not only for the reason that it played into Danny's desires of making false accusations against her. It was also stupid from the fact that there are no winners in that kind of "I can top that" type of "jokes". Unfortunately, Linda did not seem to realize that playing a prank on a person who was addicted to playing pranks himself, was guaranteed to anger rather than amuse him.

But back to your comments on what your own reactions would have been. I can understand your reaction--but also I cannot see you playing the kind of stunts on your wife that Danny had pulled on Linda through the years--and in situations in which she had no choice but to take it gracefully and with "good humor". You impress me as one who would have a LOT more respect for your wife than to go out of your way to embarrass her by stupid "practical jokes" at her expense. So when you are evaluating this strange episode, it would be well to remember that Linda had had 19 years of training in this type of prank--that the perpetrator sees as funny but neither the victim nor the bystanders can even comprehend, much less think is ha-ha funny.

People do stupid things all the time, so this does not surprise me.... as for your other idea that if you were innocent you would not do anything to fuel your spouse's suspicions.....well.... being the heathen that I am, I would just for the fun of it.... btjm.....

Exactly. It is only the innocent person who would do something like this. If one had the slightest bit of guilt they would definitely NOT have taken any chances on Danny finding something like this that might expose their guilt. Don't forget that Alyssa by now had her own apartment and that Linda was spending some time there. If the pg test had been bought for actual use, it would have been used on one of Linda's visits to Alyssa's apartment.

[Panama_Pete]

So yes, as much as admire Linda for her obvious good points and believe totally in her innocence of the charges, I still think this was a stupid thing to do, and not only for the reason that it played into Danny's desires of making false accusations against her. It was also stupid from the fact that there are no winners in that kind of "I can top that" type of "jokes". Unfortunately, Linda did not seem to realize that playing a prank on a person who was addicted to playing pranks himself, was guaranteed to anger rather than amuse him.

Linda's father used to tell Linda that she had thin skin. That being the case, I cannot see Linda sitting by while Danny goes through everything with a magnifying glass. When I read about these search and seizures, I did not understand them to be a one-time event. Am I wrong?

There would come a point where enough is enough. Also, an intelligent person would start to pick up on the reasons behind the search and seizures as well.

Something similar happened to me when I was a student at an Adventist academy. Something was stolen and "they" started searching all of the dormitory rooms one-by-one for "it."

I remember how deeply offended I was when they got to my room and wanted to "search" it. Especially when one considers what the "it" was.

(It was something in the category of a manure shovel.)

I remember losing all respect for the people in my dorm room - which I shared with a roommate. That demotion of respect I felt hasn't changed to this day. (No, they never did find "it.")

Naturally, any self-respecting person would respond to a man going searching through everything with suspicous pretenses. We call our feelings "stupid" until it happens to us.

I don't think stupidity plays a role here. I think Linda Sheleton was trying to send Mr. Shelton a "don't tread on me" message which he used against her.

I also have another question: I have never seen the June 16th letter from Walter Thompson that Watchbird refers to. Is it posted on this site somewhere?

This post has been edited by Panama_Pete: Jul 28 2006, 11:20 AM

[watchbird]

Linda's father used to tell Linda that she had thin skin. That being the case, I cannot see Linda sitting by while Danny goes through everything with a magnifying glass. When I read about these search and seizures, I did not understand them to be a one-time event. Am I wrong?

You are correct, and this comes through in both the letter where Walt Thompson wrote and in what I wrote, though perhaps I did not make it as strong as what it came through to me in Linda's telling of the story. Yes, Danny's searches had been going on for a long time, and Linda was getting rather tired of that fact, hence her commenting to Alyssa, "Let's give him something to find, for a change."

There would come a point where enough is enough. Also, an intelligent person would start to pick up on the reasons behind the search and seizures as well.

Something similar happened to me when I was a student at an Adventist academy. Something was stolen and "they" started searching all of the dormitory rooms one-by-one for "it."

I remember how deeply offended I was when they got to my room and wanted to "search" it. Especially when one considers what the "it" was.

(It was something in the category of a manure shovel.)

I remember losing all respect for the people in my dorm room - which I shared with a roommate. That demotion of respect I felt hasn't changed to this day. (No, they never did find "it.")

Naturally, any self-respecting person would respond to a man going searching through everything with suspicous pretenses. We call our feelings "stupid" until it happens to us.

I don't think stupidity plays a role here. I think Linda Sheleton was trying to send Mr. Shelton a "don't tread on me" message which he used against her.

I agree, though I have also used the word "stupid". A person's "space" is very important to them, and "abuse" is given and felt when their "space" is violated. And that space includes private areas in their own home, that no one else, even a spouse, invades.

I also have another question: I have never seen the June 16th letter from Walter Thompson that Watchbird refers to. Is it posted on this site somewhere?

No, it is not. Unlike the May letter which was plainly labeled as being mass mailed to everyone, I only have two different copies of this one, each is personally addressed to a different individual, and there are minor differences in the introductory and closing paragraphs as would be appropriate for each individual. The interiors of the letters, howeve, are identical, so they seem to be a form letter, though not necessarily mass mailed. We talked about posting it here, but decided not to do so on the basis that we did not know how large a distribution had been made, and also that they were so very nearly like the mass mailing Walt had sent out the month before. We may change our minds later, but at the moment, the only thing on BSDA from those letters is the paragraph I quoted in #24 of this thread.

[inga]

Linda buying a pregnancy test kit knowing that her husband was sterile and suspicious of her having an affair was STUPID.

Yes, I have to agree on that one.

I think God gave us a sense of humor to get us over the rough places in life, but IMO there are several subjects which are never appropriate subjects for a joke in a Christians life. Among these are the nature and characer of God and His Word and marriage.

Having said that, Linda's joke was no more stupid than most of the ones Danny told on screen in front of millions. Many were put-downs of Linda.

The way Watchbird tells it makes it evident that Linda had no idea of the seriousness of Danny's hunt for evidence and that he was really planning to get rid of her. As co-founder of the ministry she probably didn't even consider the possibility that she could be so easily ousted. However, with 20/20 hindsight, I'm quite sure Linda wouldn't do the same thing again if she could go back and do things over.

But how many of us have foresight that's as good as our hindsight?

[Observer]

Linda buying a pregnancy test kit knowing that her husband was sterile and suspicious of her having an affair was STUPID. It was a bad ideal. If it was me I would have not found it funny but only add fuel to my suspicious. I would think that if you are innocent of the accused affair that you would not do anything to add to your spouse’s suspicious.

I hope that for those of you who are close to this story, are not so naïve to think that for others reading this that don’t know Danny or Linda, that they could come to a conclusion that there is more to this than a practical joke played by Linda.

The comments made to me, and from some who have been strong supporters of Linda, are that it was a stupid thing to do, and Dr. Thompson has scored a point. There are fair-minded people who will think that there is more involved than a simple practical joke. So, let us look at the possibilities:

As claimed, it was a joke: If this is the case, Linda made an error in judgment. She did something that really was not funny, and it has now come back to hurt her. Hindsight is often better than one's thinking at the time of the action. Probably, all of us reading this thread can testify to times when we have made poor decisions.

This gives credence to the charges that Linda was unfaithful: O.K. Some will likely take this position. This is about much more than the divorce. If Linda was guilty as charged, should she at this point in her life be trashed as is happening to her? Should she not be allowed to get on with her life? As others have suggested, the continued attacks on her in an effort to stop her from getting on with her life is feeding the fire that continues to burn at the gates of 3ABN. But, this is more complex. Charges have been implied against Danny and others at 3ABN. Does not simple justice require that if Linda is treated one way, that same standard should be applied to those others, if proven to be true?

To those who support Linda: you have been injured, but it is not a deadly wound. Continue on.

To those who support the position taken by Danny and 3ABN: Truth has not yet been revealed in its fullness, justice has not yet been accomplished. This saga will continued to unfold. Stand-by for more.

[lurker]

This whole thing reminds me of something that happened to me back in the 50's. First of all, I am a woman in spite of the name lurker. I worked in a hospital and had accidently left the wrist of a rubber glove in my uniform pocket. We reused them for rubber bands. They are those gloves that feel like condom material. My husband felt it in my pocket and thought he had found something untill he saw how huge it was and did his eyes ever bug out. In spite of his unreasonable jealousy I had to laugh about that one. Linda, if you read this, I know its not funny but only someone who has been there can appreciate that you've gotta laugh or cry.

This post has been edited by lurker: Jul 29 2006, 07:13 AM